Day 28 has been raining and foggy and tired, just tired. got work tasks done, almost fell asleep at an afternoon meeting, dinner date was cancelled, sadly – but useful. early night. turn off the machines, grab a book, go to bed early and catch up on sleep. why so tired? maybe it’s the age thing and I just need more hours a night. Last night didn’t go to bed till 2am, got up at 7. Maybe it’s the weather. Maybe it’s an internal tiredness, the journey up the mountain, the commitment to change, the dance between satisfied with what is, whatever it is, and the yearning, wistful, for that more. Hope for more of love and pleasure and being courted and desired and just as I am. so, sometimes, tired of wanting.
It’s all I can do tonight – count. I’m still here. night 28. Malchut of Netzach, A moment of Majestic silence inside a vast infinite endless being. close the door. turn off the lights. forgive the world for a day of possibilities and forge ahead.
End of week four.
22 to go.

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SINAI 5-0 countup2love. day 29. 4/27 How does happy happen??